I. told his parent's he's gay, which went remarkably well other than his mother randomly saying "Don't get AIDS" and some parallels to his 'challenge' being drawn with an Aunt who typically dates losers.

("We all have challenges!")

Last night we were out with a Broken Hearts Club kind of birthday party and my boyfriend and his well dressed professional college strolled in to the pub. And that is how I met them. I was a curiosity, the invisible girlfriend made visible. "He doesn't really kiss and tell," they smiled. Some more wolfish than others.

The next day he hints he is concerned that I will be surrounded by sharks other guys in the water. Can't you feel them circling, honey, Can't you feel them schooling around? That's partly true but he misunderstands my relationship with surfing. It is cool to be in a place where everyone is young and beautiful and living the dream, but: it's almost impossible to be acknowledged in the line up if you're a board bunny, and you intimidate anyone who isn't as good as you or who is insecure about their skills. Only guys I've met who are pretty confident, in the water and out, seek out ladies with boards. A selection of guys like to use surfing to pick up and it doesn't really dazzle girls who do it themselves; you can't really take me down to the beach break and give me that cute little 'first lesson' anymore. Guys who you do surf with regularly adopt older-brother mentalities and tell anyone who would hit on you to get lost, generally hanging around and disapproving of everyone who comes by. And honestly... I've often passed it up because I would rather avoid the distraction and focus on having a good session, go to bed early and alone and get the first waves in the morning. Which, for the record, I often did.

Surfing is an inherently communal and selfish sport. It's communal because everyone is united in a love for and shares an understanding about certain things that are very difficult to explain to people who don't do it. People who don't surf are always trying to draw analogies to something in their lives and don't understand. It's selfish, though, because in the end you want the best wave of the day, you want less people in the line up so you catch more than a couple waves once in awhile, you want the best spots to be secrets or uninhabited.